Everyone Wants a Village— Until It’s Their Turn to Be Part of It
We all want community.
We want to feel supported, understood, and surrounded by people who will show up when life gets heavy or uncertain. We crave the kind of connection where someone checks in just because, where we can ask for help without guilt, and where there’s a genuine sense of “we’re in this together.”
But here’s the thing most people don’t talk about:
Everyone wants a village… until it’s their turn to be part of it.
Community Isn’t Always Convenient
Building a real, lasting sense of community takes effort. It means showing up for others even when it’s not easy or convenient.
Sometimes that looks like:
Bringing a meal to a new parent when you’ve had a long day yourself.
Attending a friend’s event even though it’s easier to stay home.
Checking in on someone, even if you don’t know what to say.
Offering help before you’re asked, because you remember what it’s like to need it.
It’s not always comfortable. But those small, intentional acts are what make community feel real and safe.
When we only show up when it’s easy, we build loose networks; people who know each other but rarely connect deeply. But when we show up consistently, when we’re willing to be a little inconvenienced for the sake of care, we start to build something that lasts. That’s where the real “village” begins.
The Inconvenient Truth About Support
Community care isn’t one-sided. It’s not only about receiving help when we need it, it’s also about being there when someone else does.
That can be hard in a culture that teaches us to be self-sufficient, to stay busy, to protect our time and energy at all costs. But true community is reciprocal. It’s a rhythm of giving and receiving, trusting that when you pour into others, there will be a time when others will pour into you, too.
It’s also imperfect. Sometimes you’ll show up for people who won’t be able to return the favor right away. Sometimes you’ll be the one in need, and someone else will carry the load. But over time, these exchanges create the kind of trust and belonging that can’t be built any other way.
Ways to Show Up for Your Community
If you’re wondering what it actually means to be part of a community, here are a few simple, meaningful ways to start:
💛 Reach out first. Don’t wait for someone to ask for help or connection. A simple “thinking of you” message can go a long way.
💛 Offer something small. Drop off coffee for a tired friend, share a meal, or send a small care package. Little gestures add up.
💛 Show up physically. Attend events, gatherings, or meetups, even if you feel nervous or tired. Presence builds connection.
💛 Be generous with your skills. Maybe you’re great at cooking, organizing, or listening. Offer those gifts when you can.
💛 Check in after the big moments. After the baby is born, after the loss, after the move, those quiet weeks afterward are when support often matters most.
💛 Let others show up for you, too. Community care goes both ways. Receiving help creates space for others to give, and that’s healing for everyone involved.
These acts may feel small, but they’re the foundation of the village we all talk about wanting.
When We All Show Up, Everyone Benefits
When we show up for each other (even imperfectly), we remind ourselves that we’re not meant to do life alone. We remind each other that kindness still exists, that care is still possible, and that love can live in simple, everyday moments.
And the more we practice this, the more natural it becomes. That’s when community transforms from something we talk about into something we feel.
The Heart Behind The Kindness Exchange
This is exactly what inspired me to create The Kindness Exchange, a workshop series that brings people together through shared care, learning, and intentional giving.
Each gathering focuses on something nourishing for both the body and the heart, from mindful pregnancy and postpartum wellness to family-centered care, while also inviting participants to give back to families in need.
It’s a space where we can practice showing up for one another, build genuine connections, and experience what community really feels like.
Because community isn’t something we find, it’s something we build together.
