How to Find an LGBTQ+ Friendly and Affirming Practitioner
Your Guide to Building a Safe & Supportive Care Team
When you’re queer, trans, nonbinary, or part of the LGBTQIA+ community, finding a provider who truly sees and affirms you can make all the difference, especially during sensitive seasons like pregnancy, postpartum, and parenthood.
Too many LGBTQ+ folks have experienced dismissal, judgment, misgendering, or care that feels clinical but not compassionate. You deserve better, and you don’t have to settle for “tolerated” when you could be celebrated.
Here’s how to find LGBTQ+ friendly (and affirming!) providers who will support your whole self.
Know the Difference: Friendly vs. Affirming
Let’s start here:
LGBTQ+ friendly might mean “I won’t judge you.”
LGBTQ+ affirming means “I actively respect and center your identity in the way I care for you.”
Affirming providers don’t just accept LGBTQ+ patients, they’ve done (and continue to do) the work to offer culturally aware, trauma-informed, identity-affirming care. That’s the standard you deserve.
Ask These Questions Before Booking
Whether you’re calling a new OB, therapist, lactation consultant, or bodywork specialist, here are a few questions you can ask:
“Do you have experience working with LGBTQ+ clients?”
"Have you received any specific training on LGBTQ+ health issues?"
“How do you ensure your care is inclusive and affirming?”
“Are intake forms inclusive of all genders and family structures?”
“Do you use gender-neutral language in care, such as chestfeeding or birthing parent, when appropriate?”
"Have you had experience with patients who identify as [insert your specific identity marker here]?"
"What resources do you have available to provide LGBTQ+ patients with information and support?"
If you don’t feel comfortable asking these directly, check their website, intake forms, or social media. Inclusive language and representation should be visible, not hidden.
Check Their Online Presence
Affirming providers often make their values clear. Things to look for:
Inclusive language on their website or bios
Mention of serving LGBTQIA+ or queer families
Representation in photos, testimonials, or blogs
Partnerships with queer-friendly organizations
A clear non-discrimination policy
If someone never mentions LGBTQ+ identities or only uses binary/gendered language, it may be a sign they’re not truly inclusive, or haven’t done the work yet.
Ask Your Community (Online or IRL)
Sometimes the best referrals come from those who’ve been there.
You can try:
LGBTQ+ parenting groups (on Facebook, Reddit, or Discord)
Local queer community centers or health collectives
Doula networks (like mine!)
Asking your current affirming providers for referrals to others
You can also post something like:
“Looking for an affirming pelvic floor therapist/lactation consultant/family doctor in [your city] — recommendations welcome!”
Word-of-mouth still goes a long way.
Let Your Doula Guide You
If you’re working with a doula who affirms queer families (hi, I’m here!), lean on them to help build your team. I regularly connect my clients with LGBTQIA+ affirming:
Midwives and OBs
Lactation consultants
Mental health professionals
Fertility and legal experts
Chiropractors, acupuncturists, and postpartum specialists
You don’t need to navigate this alone; part of my job is helping you find people who will care for you in the ways you need and deserve.
Trust Your Gut & Walk Away If Needed
Even with all the prep, sometimes a provider turns out to be not-so-safe. If you feel dismissed, misgendered, or uncomfortable, you are allowed to leave.
Red flags include:
Not using your correct name/pronouns after being told
Making assumptions about your family structure
Offering nonconsensual touch or language
Ignoring or brushing off your questions or concerns
Centering their discomfort over your identity
Not respecting boundaries of any sort
You are not too sensitive, you are just not being seen. You deserve care that aligns with your values and affirms your whole self.
You Deserve to Be Cared for Fully and Authentically
Finding the right provider takes work, but it’s worth it because you’re worth it.
You deserve a care team that:
✔ Respects your identity
✔ Centers your voice
✔ Supports your goals
✔ Celebrates your family
And if you need a place to start, I’ve got you. I work with a trusted network of queer-affirming practitioners and would be happy to connect you.
Reach out if you want referrals, guidance, or just someone to talk through your options with. You're not alone, and you’re always welcome here.
LGBTQIA+ Affirming Provider Directories + Resources
Finding safe, inclusive care shouldn’t be a guessing game. Here are some helpful places to start:
Mental Health & Therapy
Inclusive Therapists – Mental health professionals who center the needs of marginalized communities, including LGBTQIA+ folks.
Therapy for Queer People of Color – Therapist directory and mental wellness resources for QTBIPOC individuals.
The National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network – A healing justice organization offering a therapist directory for queer and trans people of color.
Medical, Fertility, and Birth Providers
OutCare Health – A directory of LGBTQ+ affirming providers across various specialties.
GLMA Provider Directory – Healthcare professionals who identify as or are affirming of LGBTQ+ individuals.
Queer & Trans Fertility Resources – A curated list by Maia Midwifery including fertility, conception, and parenting resources.
Parenting & Birth Support
Family Equality – Legal resources, family building support, and advocacy tools for LGBTQ+ families.
Queer Birth Project – Research-based support, advocacy, and education for queer birthing people.
La Leche League: LGBTQ+ Parents – Support for all kinds of families navigating lactation and feeding journeys.
Community-Based Help
Local LGBTQ+ centers (many have parent groups or can connect you to affirming providers)
Facebook groups like LGBTQ+ Parents, Queer Birth Workers, or local queer parenting communities
Your doula! (If you're working with me, I’d love to help you find referrals tailored to your needs.)
Ready to chat? I’d love to connect with you and hear about your hopes for this journey.
